My friend wrote into the group chat…
“Candy man, Candy man, Candy man.”
It was met by a response from another in the group…
“I am glad you whispered that”
I added my further response into the group…
“That doesn’t work because it has to be all one word. Like, Candyman, Candyman, Candyman… oh shit, what, wait!“
My friend came back with…
“Enjoy your final blog tonight, Iain! There’s a thought – if you knew it was your final blog, what would you share?”
And that is a fascinating idea. If you know that you have one final blog to write, what subject would you choose to write it on?
It would be even more interesting if it was your last blog, and then you have to die. What would you write about?
My initial reaction would be to ask if I could make my final blog before death one million words long. And then I would write as slow as Dante’s journey through hell. I don’t want to die. I am not sure if they will go for that, but I think it’s worth attempting.
All joking aside, what would I write if it was my last blog?
It is an interesting question because I have been wondering about what I will do once I reach my set goal of blogging every day this year. Will I continue to blog daily, or will I pare it back a bit. Or will I just stop?
I had already been thinking about what would be my final blog on the 31st of December 2021 but being my last blog ever adds another dimension to that thought.
I don’t know what I would blog about. I guess it would be something about regrets because although I say I have no regrets, like many people, I know I do on the inside. I have always felt that it takes a strong person to open up about their regrets or a life-changing moment, such as death, to bring out honest regret.
So if I am going to die, which is as life-changing as you can get, then I will share my regrets so that others can possibly learn from them.
I regret punching my best friend in the side of the head when I lost my temper on a duel over a girl. You should never let emotion make decisions for you, and I lost when I raised my fist.
I regret drinking an entire bottle of vodka as a teenager on a beach in Dieppe and nearly killing myself. I was trying to be the big man, and bravado is never a good trait in a person and can get you killed.
I regret buying two teenagers alcohol from a local store on the night that my daughter was born. I broke the rules for the wrong reason. Break rules for the right reason.
I regret not working harder at school because I love learning. But I did learn, just not what the teachers wanted me to learn, which was arrogant. Arrogance is a terrible trait in a person. It will stop you from taking on actual knowledge from people willing to give it.
I regret the moments that I didn’t let myself be happier or the times I held back because I had fear shouting at me from inside my head. Fear makes us do what we don’t want to do, especially when we want to do it. How you handle fear is the difference between a successfully content person versus an almost achiever.
I regret not saying what I meant to say to the people that matter most in my life and…
But wait, now that I think about it. All of the above has probably gone into making me who I am to this very day. So with that reflection, out drops another question.
Am I happy with who I am these days? Can I look at myself in the mirror and be satisfied with what stares back at me.
What’s my answer?
I am happy. I see a man with faults and a few demons, but I see someone who has come through some shit and held it together. A person that continues to learn and has tried to help others along the way. I am good with that. I tried my best most of the time and was at my worst the other times. I am a human and dancer.
Now I have to ask you.
If you had one final blog, what would you write?
What is your answer if you asked the person you see in the mirror about being happy with what you are staring back at?
Answers on a postcard, please!!
When I look forward to my final blog of this year, I have to think deeper about what it will be on. I am just not sure yet. Who knows.
I know that I will not be writing about my regrets on the 31st of December because it won’t be my last blog. I will continue to write…
That’s if I am still alive. Which I hope to be very much. Isn’t that so, Candyman, Candyman, Candyman?
Eh, Candy… man?